FIrst Love [Chapter 2]

The hundred and forty third times I met you, it was on the ball night.

*The theme for the ball night was masquerade. All students who attend the ball need to wear a mask. This theme set suspense and mysterious feelings to the students.*

Tonight, although everyone were wearing mask, I still can find her. She is now, standing a few meters in front of me wearing a lilac chiffon gown. She looks so beautiful tonight.

The music starts. I see her walking away from the dance floor. Does it mean that she doesn’t have a partner for the night? I walk up to her and it surprised her.

“Miss. May I dance with you?” I ask her and held out my hand.

She doubts it but her friends keep encouraging her to dance with me. Finally, she put her hands on top of mine. I smile to her and she smile back to me. We walk to the center of the dance floor and slow dance to keep pace with the slow music which is playing that time.

I look into her eyes. Surprisingly, she looks back into mine also. Then, both of us smile. I start our conversation. I planned to say out all my feelings for her. I know I can do it tonight. She won’t know it would be me. She can’t guess it was me because I’m wearing a mask. I can do it. I can.

“You know what?”

“Hmm…”

“I’ve already know you for 2 years. Do you remember 2 years ago, we met on the street? I mean, bumped on each other on the street. From that day, I hope to see you again. Then, the second time we met, it was at the tuition centre. I wanted to greet you but I’m not brave enough to do that. Each time when I saw you, I will be very happy because I can see your cheerful smile.”

“I...”

“Sshhh… Let me finish first. Okay?”

She nods her head.

“Since then, I realized it was love at first sight.”

She seems to be surprised by my words.

“Everyday, my feelings for you grows stronger and stronger. When you talk with your friend, how I wish it was me who you are talking to. When you are happy, how I wish I’m the one to share your happiness and laugh with you. When you are sad, how I wish I can hug you and borrow my shoulders for you to cry on. When you have news to share, how I wish I’m the one to share it with you. When we were on holiday, I miss you so much. After we graduate from secondary school, it broke my heart whenever I think of couldn’t see you anymore. But, my chance came again. This time, I’m not going to let go of this chance.”

I breathe in a few times. I’m trying to gather all my courage to confess to her.

“I…I love you. Will you be my girlfriend?”

“I… I… ah…”

After a long pause, she still hasn’t answer my question. I feel my heart broke into thousands of pieces. It was at the end of the song. I spin her around and disappear myself to the exit.

The hundred and forty forth times I met you, it was at the hallway.

*It was the day right after the ball night. We walk into each other. I try to avoid you but you greet me.*

“Hi, Jae Joong. How are you?”

“I’m fine and how are you?” I force a smile on my face. It was a lie. My heart hasn’t recovered from the wound that you’ve cause. It was so deep and it will take me a long time to heal it.

“Oh, I’m fine too.”

Then, it was a moment of silence. She looks like she was thinking something. After I told her how I feel last night and she’s kinda rejected me, my heart really hurts. It hurt so badly till I shed my tears. I can’t bear with my feelings anymore. All I want to do now is to avoid her.

“Erm… I’m in a hurry. Chat next time when we have the time. Bye.”

I said bye to her and run away. I never look back at her. I didn’t even listen to her reply. It hurts me again when I said bye to her. It’s as if the good bye is for eternal.